Tuesday, March 9, 2010

The Oscars|Bumpkin Style

It was a blast over at Twitter this year, I laughed so hard I almost cried. Red Carpet Twitterganza I would say. I was getting 100-105 tweets in 2-3 minute time frames, and I'm really a nobody over there. Can't wait to do it again.
I'm going to make it easy, here's my Very Best, to the Very Very Worst, in order mind you.
Best Dressed!

Now it's just my opinion, but if I get one for Best Dressed.
Demi rocked it. Nude Versace Atelier, ruffles, Versace shoes , perfect wispy hair, natural with a touch of summer makeup, did I mention the Versace shoes, Salvatore Ferragamo clutch, oh and the diamonds. Demi is 47 ya'll, and as I always say Maybe 40 sucks, and MAYBE IT DOESN'T!!

Penelope Cruz in Donna Karan. Latin Beauty at it's best. Now, all kidding aside, is part of the appeal with this dress because it perfectly matches the carpet and drapes? Really, it does, looks as if the set was built in her honor. If you watched her live, she worked that runway girls, she worked it. Camera's didn't turn away till she was a speck of Crimson.

Cameron Diaz in Oscar de la Renta, lucky for her. A brave move by the stylist, with the lips and fingernails in slut whore red. It worked though, style at it's best. I'm not so crazy about Cameron, I still see her as the bride in My Best Friend's Wedding, singing that one song; you know the one.

Best Dressed At The After Party

Katy Perry in Zuhair Marad. I think this is what we all strive for everyday when we stand in the mirror, and perform our routines. Perfection, and the dress is just a dress here, the lady holds the beauty. Great dress, but still.........oh yeah, and the bracelet, I forget to see the diamonds, purses, and shoes, takes me a day or two to get over the dresses. But yes I see the ruby red Dorothy shoes clutch there, I see it.

Honorable Mention

Elizabeth Banks in storm colored Versace. A beautiful girl, but could you imagine this on a redhead, breath taking.

Most Adorable Couple

Lenny Kravitz and his daughter Zoe, were right on the dime.
Old Hollywood style dress on the red carpet. Classy, Classy, Classy, and Daddy just oozes style in my opinion. Can you see her mother Lisa Bonet in her?

The Middle Ground
Great dress, bad color. I just don't think brunettes and gold go well together. She's was too pale, and ps what is it with the Grandma lipstick tonight, this shade is Revlon Ruby. Sandra Bullock in Marchesa.

Charlize Theron, in John Galliano.
Placing the roses there, yes or no? Sure is a lot of talk about her today. I just can't make up my mind, she is so beautiful? Was someone standing at the end of the red carpet with this freaking lipstick?

I love Sarah Jessica Parker, and I love Chanel, and that's all I am saying. **Cough** **Cough*** Carrie would barf!

Now I'm all about Vintage Glam, but this is awful. Nicole Richie, these drapes just swallowed her away. Reem Acra is the designer, in my opinion Ream The Stylist would be more accurate.

Vera Farmiga in Marchesa. Now I love ruffles, but this is just way to ruffly okay. This is over the top ruffles, with Grandma's Avon Lipstick. No, No, NO! I was waiting for Charro to jump out and say Hoochie Coochie Coo!

Well, if it ain't Boobs Larue at The Oscars. When is this woman going to grow up? Your husband is 29, your'e not honey. At 40 they're a few things we must accept.
Mariah Carey. The dress is a Valentino, but a disaster in my opinion. Isn't the rule that you either show legs or bust, not everything including bulges? She is sucking it in so hard it's about to burst out somewhere.

Alright what else ya'll wanna know?

The Bumpkin


MCW said...

I read that Mariah's heels were so high that she had have her body guards help her walk! She looks like she is STUFFED into that dress.

A "cheery" disposition said...

I agree with everything you said. In fact when I saw Sarah Jessica Parkers dress I thought to myself.. Carrie Bradshaw would never wear that. But I still love Sarah!

Slumber Designs said...

You were pretty much right on with your review!

As for Demi: Not a big fan of her's. There's just something about her that I don't like. But she did look amazing!!

As for Charlize: Really, Charlize? When you put that on did you really think that two Cinnabons on your chest looked good? Next time, drag me along and I'll help you out.

As for Mariah: Ugghh, I rarely think she looks good. Oscar night was no different. Maybe if she started wearing the right size she would look a little better.

As for Best Couple: I think I might have to pick Joel and Nicole. Those two are so cute together. They've come so far and have such a great family!

But overall, well done girl, well done!!

Nezzy said...

Howdy, your name pulled this Ozarks farm chick over to meet the Bumpkin and surprisingly I found glamor. Yep, I agree Mariah was 'bustin' out in her seams. I agree with most your fabs and flubs. The flower boobs...what were they thinkin'??? Just sayin......

God bless ya'll from the hills and hollers of the Missouri Ponderosa!!!!

Mi Vida Bonita said...

I still can't beleive what Mariah was wearing..I Mean come on!

Demi looks beautiful!

Bama Girl said...

Bravo on your Bumpkin Oscar review!!! The humor was fabulous, I almost spit Diet coke while reading!!! :-) I might be in the minority here, but I actually loved Sandra Bullock's ensemble. Then again I love her, so maybe I'm not being fair. XOXO

Hetty Summers said...

Many peole disliked the oscars this year, but I have to admit, I loved it. Great pic collection.

Hetty xoxo

Erika said...

Oh I so loved Sandra Bullock's look (even the red lipstick which I took as a nod to old glam) until she got up on stage and I realized that the WHOLE dress was silver. When she was sitting and the little glimpse I got on the red carpet I thought the skirt was maybe a really great champagne/gray/oyster colored silk. Something like that with that stunning bodice, wow. Giant chunk of sterling, not so much.

Also I plan on using lyrics from Vienna by Billy Joel. It's my favorite song of all time. Although I am not sure which portion I am going to use yet. If you are interested and unfamiliar here are the lyrics:


and here is the story behind it, cause really the story is what makes this song so great:


C'est La Vie said...

haha these made me laugh

sometimes i don't know WHAT people are thinking!

OceanDreams said...

Sorry I missed your little party on twitter, sounds like you had fun! I like your picks and from my blog you already know which dresses were my favorites. ;)

Hope Chella said...

Of all of the blogger Oscar dress reviews I agree with you most! Mariah Carey ALWAYS looks horrible in what she wears and she doesn't even have a bad figure!!!!


the southern hostess said...

Loved Demi's look too!

Dustjacket Attic said...

Oh one of the best reviews I've read, love it Bumpkin. So funny. I agree, Demi looked totally fabulous, so stylish but didn't look like she tried too hard.

Great post,
xxx DJ
ps I'm pretty sure Sandra changed hot pink for soft red lipstick once she was inside...on stage it looked very different to the red carpet...could be wrong :o

Colleen said...

Ha, I agree completely with all your observations. Demi is amazing, and all of those first few dresses were breathtaking. Great observation on how the storm hued dress would've looked on a redhead!

Miss Janice said...

I totally agree with #1, 2, & 3! Demi Moore looks fantastic and the dress and hair...perfect. Penelope looked just like her beautiful self always looks. Cameron looked like a beautiful movie star! And...I agree about Sarah Jessica...Love her. Love Chanel. When I first saw her, I tweeted about how much I loved the look. But taking a second look....hmmmmmmmmm!